Why is it that we have so many rules and regulations for every single industry in the United States of America? We attack our business community each and every day and we make rules and regulations that lawyers use in extortion tactics to sue American companies. We need to reduce the rules and regulations in our nation for our business communities and we need to put more rules and regulations on the lawyers, which I believe to be professional parasites and terrorists against the American people.

I propose that each and every lawyer be given a lie detector test and a drug tests annually or they cannot renewal their legal license to practice law. Additionally, everybody in each law firm will be required to take a lie detector test annually to make sure that they are not trying to break the law by controlling the law or staying above law.

If we fail to watch over the legal industry they will continue to manipulate our laws further their own personal financial gain as they are self-serving parasites against humanity. There is nothing worse than a crooked lawyer and probably nothing more common in my opinion. And since this is my opinion you cannot sue me; you rotten scoundrel lawyers. Consider this in 2006.

“Lance Winslow” - Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs/

A trendy new nightclub that caters to baby boomers who find themselves unexpectedly single was raided by police last night. Acting on a tip from a twenty-something couple who entered the hotspot by accident, police were able to determine that many of the partying patrons were dropping antacid.

The owner, who was taken away in cuffs, claimed, “I had no idea some of the customers were dropping that stuff. But somehow they were smuggling it past the bouncers - Alka-Seltzer, Tums, Rolaids, you name it. Had I known, I would have slipped them some complimentary club soda.”

A female boomer noted, as she was being booked, “I admit it. I’ve become addicted to Alka-Seltzer How would you like to be in your fifties and be back out on the meat market? I just hope my children understand.”

A male patron, who was apprehended while attempting to escape as fast as he could amble down the street, lamented, “I’m single, I’m upset, so no wonder I need regular doses of Mylanta. And there’s nothing I won’t do to get it - rob, murder, even pick up a bottle at the drugstore.”

To the relief of the distraught boomers, who have a seemingly irrepressible urge to enjoy life even into their later decades, the club is scheduled to reopen tonight.

However, upon arrival the trendy crowd will notice that a new sign has been placed above the entrance, notifying them that “The Possession Of Antacid On These Premises Is Strictly Forbidden.”

Tom Attea, creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway and has written comedy for TV. Critics have called his writing “”delightfully funny” and “witty” with “good, genuine laughs.”

Have you ever met someone who worked at the CIA or has retired from the CIA? Well if you have there is a good chance he is gay. Many people in the intelligence industry are homosexuals and many are very flagrant homosexuals although some are still closet homosexuals and you might not even know that if we did not tell you. But they if they tell you they use to work at the CIA there is a good chance they are homosexual or gay.

Some conspiracy theorists believe that over 80% percent of the people who work at the CIA are homosexuals, whereas others say it is only about 20 percent. But no matter what if you know someone who works at the CIA or is ex-CIA then they are probably gay.

When you meet someone who says they work at the CIA or has formerly worked at the CIA you must assume that they are automatically homosexuals and gay. I am not the only one who believes this, you would be surprised to how many people around Washington D.C. believe the same thing.

If you are homosexual there is a good chance you can get hired by the CIA and travel to foreign lands on taxpayers money and even get good benefits when you retire. Plus you will be able to screw many foreigners in more ways that one. It is great that homosexuals have a place in our government? This proves we are a non-biggot nation and that our government is equal opportunity employer for homosexuals. Consider this in 2006 especially if you are gay.

“Lance Winslow” - Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs/

Saddam Hussein, now formally charged with crimes against humanity, is now faced with charges by irate tie makers.

“This man is guilty of killing the tie business,” a representative of the plaintiffs stated immediately after his arrival from New York’s garment district. “And the evidence is right before your eyes. Every day he shows up in court wearing a white shirt without a tie.”

Mr. Hussein defended his actions, saying, “It’s perfectly understandable why I avoid ties. I don’t want to feel anything tight around my neck, at least, until I don’t have a choice. Meanwhile, I have every right to hang loose.”

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway and has written comedy for TV. Critics have called his writing “”delightfully funny” and “witty” with “good, genuine laughs.”